Today I’m sharing some of my favorite open‑ended questions  to drive genuine bonding — the kind of questions that dissolve distance, reveal motivations, and accelerate trust. These come from behavioral science, negotiation research, and years of experience observing what truly deepens human connection. Feel free to share yours! Here are the tips, tricks and secret insights: Tip #1 — Ask “story‑opening” questions Instead of asking facts, invite narratives. These questions act

here’s the uncomfortable truth 👇 When a counterpart backs out after  the agreement, it’s rarely about price, terms, or workload. It’s about fear . Fear of commitment. Fear of loss of control. Fear of discovering that your “yes” and their “yes” were never the same thing. In "The Science of Negotiation Secrets", one idea hits hard: “Yes” is not validation — “Exactly” is. A “yes” without alignment of needs, limits, and execution steps is nothing more than polite noise. And here

All our research references sorted by order of appearance 1.          Royer S. A Negotiation System for Leaders . Business Science Institute; 2022. 2.          Byrnes JF. Ten guidelines for effective negotiating. Bus Horiz . 1987;30(3):7-12. doi:10.1016/0007-6813(87)90030-9 3.          Jay A. Conger. The Necessary Art of Persuasion. Harv Bus Rev . 1998;(May-June 1998). Accessed January 5, 2019. https://hbr.org/1998/05/the-necessary-art-of-persuasion 4           Armand Jean du

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Let’s be honest: it’s not “just you”. 𝟯𝟬% of people involved in negotiations admit they’re afraid their offer will be seen as shocking or disrespectful. So what do they do? They soften. They wait for the other side. They hide behind “let’s see your proposal first”. And then they complain that suppliers or internal stakeholders “always anchor too high / ask for too much”. Of course they do. You gifted them the steering wheel. 𝐒𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚�

Yesterday I wrapped up a negotiation in 15 minutes. Target achieved, supplier smiling, team relieved. I should have been happy. Instead, that little voice: “𝘐𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘺 ‘𝘺𝘦𝘴’ 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵… 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘸?” This is where most negotiators get it wrong. They do one of two things: 1️⃣ Beat themselves up for days. 2️⃣ Reopen the price and destroy trust. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐲. If the deal meets ambitious objectives you defined

Many negotiation models still taught and shared today were designed for one purpose: helping people understand negotiation conceptually. But, at senior levels, negotiations rarely fail because leaders don’t know: • the phases of negotiation • their BATNA • their ZOPA • or which “style” to adopt 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘯𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥. In real executive negotiations: • Alternatives are u

Stay firm. Listen carefully. Hold your ground when a counterpart uses malicious techniques. But here’s what almost nobody tells you… When someone throws a too‑good‑to‑be‑true promise, a deceptive proposal, or a crafted sales pitch at you, the worst thing you can do is fight it head‑on. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞? • Put their “promise” in writing. • Not to trap them. But to expose the technique — without making them lose face. Most negotiators don’t do this because they

We’re all told the same thing in negotiation training: “Come with a clear, SMART objective.” ✔ 5% price reduction ✔ 2‑year contract ✔ Better payment terms Looks great on a slide. But in real life, this is where many negotiations silently fail. Because the 𝘰𝘣𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 is not the real driver. The 𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘥 it is. Next time you prepare, try this: ask yourself “𝗪𝗵𝘆?” three times. “I want 5% savings.” → 𝘞𝘩𝘺? “Because Finance expects it.” → 𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘪𝘴

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝. According to a recent study, women now negotiate their salary 𝟓𝟒% 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐯𝐬. 𝟒𝟒% 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞𝐧. 𝑺𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒃𝒍𝒆𝒎 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 “𝒘𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒏 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒂𝒔𝒌”. 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: If women 𝒅𝒐 negotiate more often than men… …why do we still see slower increases, smaller packages, and more pushback when they ask? In negotiation, whoever sets the 𝐟𝐫�

Most negotiators celebrate too early. 𝘈 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘥. 𝘈 “𝘺𝘦𝘴, 𝘸𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵.” 𝘈 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘬𝘦. And suddenly everyone relaxes… as if agreement had magically become execution. Here’s the uncomfortable reality: 𝗔 “𝘆𝗲𝘀” 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘇𝗲𝗿𝗼 𝘃𝗮𝗹𝘂𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗘𝗚𝗢𝗧𝗜𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 𝗢𝗙 𝗧𝗛𝗘 “𝗛𝗢𝗪.” In high‑stakes negotiations, the “yes” is just the door handle. The real work begins when you step into the room behind it. Suppliers know i

And it's the reason most negotiators never change. 😑 Some will hate this, but here’s what I keep seeing: We talk about 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫, 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐍𝐀, 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞, 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲… But the real threat is much quieter: 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗶𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲. In supplier meetings, it shows up instantly: – We defend a bad position because changing it would make us

That’s not a slogan. That’s the 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘶𝘴 “forgetting curve”, first observed by Hermann Ebbinghaus more than 100 years ago. Your brain is simply not designed to remember a 2‑day firehose of slides and role‑plays.  Yet companies still spend millions on one‑shot negotiation trainings … …and act surprised when nothing changes at the table.  After 3 days, most people are back to:  conceding too fast,  arguing instead of listening,  confusing “price” with “value”,  letting emot

“Trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets.” But here’s what I see in real negotiations 👇 Most buyers swing between two extremes: 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 trust: “We’ve known them for years, it’ll be fine.” 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 control: “If it’s not in the contract, I don’t believe it.” Both kill value. The best negotiators I work with don’t “hope” for trust. They 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 it, step by step, like a process. Here’s how they do it 👇 1️⃣ 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗳𝗶𝗿

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